All posts by - honestrachael

Get up stand up

Posted on: May 20, 2012: Post written by: Rachael

Mushroom has started to let go…

For months now, he has been standing holding on – to the furniture, to my hands, to the wall… Just this week, he has started to let go. For just a few seconds to begin with but he now stands for longer periods with increasing confidence. Each time he stands for any length, he claps himself. I do love the way he celebrates his achievements even when he’s the only one there (or so he thinks).

Here at Mushroom Mansions (ha!) we are all very excited by this new development. Now that he is gaining confidence, and balance, we know it won’t be too much longer before he will start walking unaided. He has been cruising around the furniture and walking holding on for a while now so its only a matter of time…

While all these new skills are great, and of course inevitable – after all, children do tend to grow up – it does make me a bit nostalgic for his babyhood. I was warned, when he was younger and I was eager for him to start eating, crawling, walking and talking, that I should enjoy this time. ‘They don’t stay babies for long!’ was something I heard, and still hear, often. Only I didn’t really get it until now. Now, as Mushroom is starting to look and act more like a little boy and less like a baby, I am hanging on to those things about him that remain babyish, for want of a better word. His pre bathtime bottle – which he still insists I hold, our late night cuddles… These have taken on a new importance now that I realise it won’t be long before he grows out of these and I’ll miss them.

I know all the things Mushroom grows out of will be replaced by exciting new ones that I will become just as fond of but for now, I am going to make sure I enjoy the rest of his babyhood as much as possible. Before he really does ‘let go.’

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Mushrooms perspective

Posted on: May 19, 2012: Post written by: Rachael

image

Today Mushroom and I went for a walk round the block. Just from our house to the corner shop – usually a five minute dash to pick up milk, with him in the buggy. Now that he’s almost walking, however, I thought it would be a nice short walk for him to practice letting go of my hands.

So, we set off after snack time on this ‘short’ walk. His little hands in mine, walking at what I consider to be quite a reasonable pace, considering. At the end of our road he stopped ‘De?’ He asked, pointing at the floor. For some reason part of the road he was pointing at had been replaced by bricks. Until today, I hadn’t even noticed it was different. A little further along he stopped again ‘Mumum?’ he asked again, pointing at a stray leaf. ‘That looks like it came off a rose bush.’ I said, looking around for one and not finding any. I tried to move on – but Mushroom wasn’t having it ‘De! De!’ He shouted, pointing above his head, just behind us. There was the rose bush. Fiery yellow and red streaked roses were just opening. They were beautiful, and I had just walked straight past it. I lifted Mushroom up so he could take a closer look. He grinned up at me and chatted away. I’ve no idea what he was saying but he was happy.

For the rest of our walk I paid more attention to his questions (considering he has yet to say more than a couple of – barely recognisable – words, he already asks a LOT of questions) and tried to answer them as best I could…

‘That’s a tree. Do you want to touch it?’ He did.
‘A feather, it comes from a bird.’
‘Wow, what a big bird.’ It was massive, and I only noticed it when Mushroom pointed it out.

The five minute walk took us about 40 minutes in the end and I forgot what I went to the shop for but it didn’t matter. Walking with Mushroom, instead of pushing him around in his buggy, made me really stop and look at the world. He made me pay attention, something I’ve been forgetting to do lately.

I think sometimes, its possible to get so wrapped up in teaching our children things – how to walk and talk, to eat nicely, to say please and thank you – that we forget to appreciate what they can teach us.

What have you learned from your children this week…?

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A week in tweets – #beenalongweek

Posted on: May 03, 2012: Post written by: Rachael

So, this week I thought I’d take part in Slummy Single Mummy’s ‘A week in tweets’ again. If you didn’t see my last post, where I ‘tweeted’ as Mushroom for a week, you can read it here.

So, here’s where I let Mushroom take over my laptop and fill us in on his week (he really did type this himself. Honest)*

Monday
Nursery today. Was ok this morning but now? Tummy hurts. Head hurts.  Teeth hurt. Mummy put me to bed early. Was grateful. #gonnabealongweek

Tuesday
Felt MUCH better. Got some shapes in the right holes in those stupid wooden things. No one clapped. So I clapped myself #gonnabealongweek

Wednesday
Clinic 2day. One toy. One! And no other babies. I asked about it but Health Visitor (that’s a name?) just said I was cute. #gonnabealongweek

Thursday
Finally some fun! Singing at Musical Minis. Then a playdate. So happy I kissed my friend. He wasn’t impressed. So I hugged his Mum. She was.

Friday
Stayed in ALL day. Tried to play with oven, told ‘No’ a million times. Take me out then! It’s just a bit of rain. You’re ill? Mums can’t be.

Saturday
Played with building blocks -knocking down Mummy’s towers! Crazy. Mum’s friend came with us to the park. She was so much fun, I kissed her.

Sunday
Went shopping. Oh fun. NOT. But got to sit on the conveyor belt while we waited for the tills 2 open. It’s the little things. #beenalongweek

*Ok, maybe I am lying. Just a bit.

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From Breast to Bottle in 5 steps

Posted on: April 27, 2012: Post written by: Rachael

A few Mums have asked me how I weaned Mushroom from breastfeeding, and this post is simply what I did, in response to these lovely readers’ requests. So I would like to start by saying thanks for reading, and getting in touch!

Just to be clear – I am not saying this is the best way to wean! In fact, I weaned him at nine months and current advice suggests that its best to wean older babies straight to a cup. That didn’t work for us, so we weaned from breast to bottle. Here’s how we did it in 5 easy (Ha!) steps, should you wish to use the same method yourself. We used Tommee Tippee bottles with no.1 anti-colic teat (for newborns! But it’s all he would take to begin with), gradually progressing to a no.3 teat (fast flow) when he got used to the bottle.

Step 1:
Offered 2oz formula at his 8am feed. He cried. A lot. Finally he took the formula and then I let him nurse as long as he pleased.

Step 2:
Offered 4oz formula at his 8am feed the next day, which he took without fuss. Let him nurse til he was full (I had to take him off but he didn’t really complain. Much).

Step 3:
Offered 6oz formula at his 8am feed on the third day. He took it happily. He decided he didn’t need to nurse as he was full. Result!

Step 4:
Repeated steps 1 – 3 for every feed until I was only nursing him to sleep.

Waited a week

Step 5:
Repeated steps 1-3 until he took a bottle at bedtime.

Mushroom now drinks his milk from a sippy cup during the day, but for the time being, he still has a bottle in the evening before his bath and bedtime. I still nurse him once or twice during the night.

Just to remind you that I’m no expert, this is just what worked for us. If you try this ‘method,’ and it works for you too, great! Do let me know. Any comments/ questions welcome.

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Be careful what you wish for

Posted on: April 18, 2012: Post written by: Rachael

At the start of this year, Mushroom cut his first tooth. It was a slow and painful process for both of us. The sleepless nights, the reduced appetite, the runny nappies (I don’t care if it’s supposedly an old wives’ tale, it happened. And stopped abruptly as soon as the tooth broke through his gum), the tantrums because he doesn’t understand that I can’t just make it better… At the time I made a passing comment to my sister-in-law ‘Poor thing, and this goes on for two years on & off! Why can’t they just get all the teeth at once & be done with it?’ She looked at me like I was mad. ‘What? Oh no, you don’t want them to come all at once!’

Since that conversation Mushroom has cut just one more tooth, which again took forever to break through (he also had a very nasty bout of tonsillitis. But that’s another story). I think a third is now on its way. He’s exhausted, I’m exhausted and we all just need a break from all the teething trouble.

I think the moral of this story is ‘Be careful what you wish for.’ That is all.

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A week in tweets – #I’mabigboy

Posted on: April 10, 2012: Post written by: Rachael

This week I thought I’d take part in Slummy Single Mummy’s ‘A week in tweets.’ This week I am doing a retrospective, tweeting as Mushroom. I enjoyed this both as a great writing exercise and a reminder of the highs and lows of the past week. The fact it made me laugh at the ‘lows’ reminds me that all the not so great stuff is only temporary, unless we hold onto it. Not a bad lesson to be reminded of! So here’s my effort (below. It’s meant to be funny. But might need work) – hope you enjoy it!

Monday
Nursery today. Mummy waited ages 4 me to wave bye. Like 2 whole minutes. I was BUSY. Separation anxiety much? Go 2 work already #I’mabigboy

Tuesday
Nursery again. Love it. I get attention ALL THE TIME. No ‘Mummy needs a shower now’ rubbish. And I can touch EVERYTHING. #I’mabigboynow

Wednesday
Me and Mummy practised walking today. A lot. Think she’s trying to get me to let go of her hand. I don’t think so. #notsuchabigboyafterall

Thursday
Met up with baby friend. We ate out. Yum. Not nearly enough playtime though. Our Mums just wanted 2 chat. BORING  #itsnotallaboutthemummies

Friday
Let Mummy have a 3 hour stretch of sleep last night. Very generous I thought. My thanks? A trip to bloody Asda. No swings. #ungratefulmummy

Saturday
Got up at 5am and did big poo. Took Mummy ages 2 realise I was complaining not singing & come sort me out. Honestly. So I got up for the day

Sunday
Got up at 1am to play but Mummy didn’t want to. She stayed in my room  though. Result. Got late birthday present too. #itsbeenagreatweek

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Mushroom’s got moves

Posted on: April 03, 2012: Post written by: Rachael

Mushroom has always loved music. From before he was born, when he used to wriggle around in my belly every time someone put the radio on at work, to his first time at a musical minis baby group when he was just four months old. He’s always swayed along with the music, but now that he’s standing and trying to walk, he is actually starting to dance properly. And the boy’s got moves.

Mushroom comes from a musical family – Daddy was part of a successful UK rap group in the early 80s and his uncles and one of his aunties on Daddy’s side ran sound systems at the same time. My sister is a singer/ songwriter/dancer and all of Daddy’s family are good dancers. Even Mushroom’s Grandma can still bust a funky move. Just last month she was showing us some of the dances they used to do at the house parties she went to in the 60s when she first came to England. With this background I’m not surprised at his love of music  but the dancing still gets me every time.

He likes all sorts of music. From standard nursery rhymes, to pop, rock and hip hop via afrobeat. He’s not keen on trance but then neither am I. Basically, if its got a beat, he’ll move. I know all babies move to music and I risk sounding boastful, but I swear he’s different. He’ll hear music blasting from a car a mile away, his face breaks into a big grin and he starts nodding his head like a miniature b-boy. If he really likes the tune he puts a hand in the air like he’s saluting some unseen DJ. If he’s not strapped in (to the pushchair/highchair etc.) he’ll find something to pull up on so he can stand up and dance. He starts with a little bounce, then that head nod, then he might lift up his left foot… He’s a bit limited at the moment as he can’t stand alone, but I can see he’s dying to move around the room and throw some shapes. I’m telling you, Mushroom’s got moves.

What does your baby do that makes you proud? Pick one thing (I know its hard to choose), and tell me about it below.

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Sleep is for wimps

Posted on: April 02, 2012: Post written by: Rachael

This is not Mushroom

Let’s be clear from the outset. I am a wimp. I love my sleep. The last time I managed several consecutive late nights* I was about 21 (I am 30 something now) and I still needed to make up for it with mammoth lie-ins. By the time I was 25, I needed to nap the afternoon before a big night out. So you can imagine how the sleep deprivation of a newborn hit me. Hard. Like a smack in the face.

You do get used to it, though. I never really believed that before, but hey – you have to. And of course the rewards are worth it. To put it in perspective, I would rather be without sleep than without Mushroom.

When he was little, I breastfed Mushroom to sleep whenever he needed it. It worked, and that magic hormone, prolactin, also helped me get back to sleep. As he got older, the health visitors (among others), told me that I should start waking him up before I put him down, to teach him to put himself to sleep. I nodded and smiled. And ignored them. Wake a sleeping baby? Madness. I would sooner return to a lit firework. Besides, he only woke three times a night (apart from during growth spurts) which, with me going to bed early, was quite manageable.

Then the ten month growth spurt kicked in (he was weaned onto bottles by this time, nursing only at night) and all bets were off. After a crazy month I decided to give sleep training a go. I started with cry-it-out (CIO) with disastrous consequences. He cried for an hour, became increasingly distressed and vomited everywhere. The Health Visitor had said not to comfort him if this happened. Yeah right, ok. Of course I comforted him! He finally went to sleep after a few hours. The next night he cried as we headed up for bathtime and I worried I had created a fear of bedtime so I overcompensated for a few nights with extra cuddles, and vowed never to do CIO again. It helped that shortly afterwards I heard from other mums who had been evangelical about how CIO had worked for them, that it had only worked temporarily for most.

A week or so after the CIO disaster, I tried a variation on one of the no-cry sleep training techniques (I can’t remember whose, its possible I made something up based on Dr Sears’ advice) with some success. I had to wait until Mushroom was almost asleep before putting him down and then hold his hand for a while, but it’s still progress. Some days this still works but throw a cold, a new developmental milestone, or teething into the mix and we’re back to sitting in the rocking chair for 20 minutes til he’s in a deep sleep.

Anyway, as I said. You get used to it. Mushroom is now a year old and I am thinking it might soon be time to change things, starting with weaning him from night nursing. This may or may not reduce the number of times he wakes. We shall see. I hear that a lot of babies start sleeping better when they start walking so I am holding on to that. In the meantime, I still refuse to let him CIO again so we will find our own way, as whatever the health visitors say, all babies are NOT the same.

I will let you know if/when we get any breakthroughs in the sleep department. Please do share your stories/frustrations below!

*Late night pre Mushroom = After 11.30pm.
Late night post Mushroom = After 9.30pm

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One year in

Posted on: March 30, 2012: Post written by: Rachael

Hello! Thanks for stopping by. If you haven’t already, you might want to read this page first. I’ll wait here til you get back.

…

Ok, so I started writing this all important first post about a week ago, and nothing I wrote felt ‘right.’ I started off at the beginning, writing about Mushroom’s birth, then I changed my mind and thought I would write about his first day at nursery, then I changed my mind again, and started to write about… Well you get the picture.

Seeing as I didn’t know where to start, I decided to write an overview of the highs and lows of Mushroom’s first year. So, let’s start at the beginning…

The birth –

Had liver failure about a month before my due date. There was talk of inducing me but Mushroom, considerate as ever, arrived two weeks early so we avoided that. Yes, it hurt. But not in the way I anticipated. Hypnotherapy worked better than I expected despite birth plan going out the window. Midwives at birth were great. Bonding was beautiful. Breastfeeding a breeze. Baby blues and postnatal pre-eclampsia were not. Ten further days in hospital were frustrating. But we survived. Mushroom was home properly about two weeks after the birth.

0-3 months –

Sleepless nights took some getting used to but Mushroom’s temperament was very laid back and we started getting to know each other a little. At this stage, his  longest awake time was around the time he was born. We settled into a routine by about 2.5/3 months. I started to stay awake during some of his naps and get stuff done. We had lots of visitors and I weaned myself off the blood pressure medicine.

3-6 months –

I thought the 4 month growth spurt (or ‘Wonder Week’ 19 – more on Wonder Weeks later) would kill me. My breasts hurt (so that’s what people had been telling me about) and I thought I would never sleep again. Mushroom developed more of a personality and we started attending baby groups and making friends. He was diagnosed with severe reflux so we introduced solid food at around 4.5 months which helped a little. Eventually we settled into a new routine. Or so I thought…

6-9 months –

Another growth spurt! The boy could eat. And eat. We went from one meal a day to three with breast milk on tap. His reflux flared up again, then disappeared. I started to think about giving up breastfeeding but we had a breakthrough when he started crawling, and clapping, and really trying to talk. Each milestone was met with much excitement and we all got a bit more sleep. For a week or two…

9-12 months –

The 10 month growth spurt (Wonder Week 46) coincided with Mushroom learning to sit up, then stand up (holding on), getting his first teeth, starting to talk, trying to walk… Basically this has been the most exhausting, and the most rewarding, three months since Mushroom was born.

So that was the first year in brief – I have left a lot out but I will write more about some, if not all, of the above in time, as well as more about where we are now – just entering the toddler years. If there is anything you would particularly like to hear more about, do let me know! I don’t claim to be any kind of parenting expert, but am happy to share my experiences and will also answer questions privately by email if you prefer.

Thanks for reading – do come back soon!

Mushroom’s Mum

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