Archives for March 2015

A Mother’s Day moment

My Mother’s Day moment didn’t actually happen on Mother’s Day.

Mother'sDayCards_MotheringMushroom

On the day itself, I received two cards from Mushroom. One he’d made for me at nursery and another he chose together with Mr B. We went out just the two of us for mini cakes and a babychino (for him! Hot chocolate with cream for me) and played together in the afternoon, during which time we had a bit of whining, and the witching hour was still… Well, the witching hour! Mr B bought takeaway so I didn’t have to cook, which did ease the evening a little… So. My Mother’s Day was… Perfectly Imperfect (yeah I know, I say that a lot. That’s parenting!).

My Mother’s Day moment came the next day…

The below photo is me and my Mum, who passed away in 2007. It was sudden and unexpected and it took a long time to find what the new normal looked it afterwards. Mushroom was born in 2011, four years later. I see a lot of her in him and sometimes that’s lovely, and sometimes sad. It’s bittersweet.

Mumandme_MotheringMushroom

Mushroom and I talk about my Mum every now and then, and he knows that sometimes I get a bit sad because I miss her. On Sunday he had asked a few questions about her during the day and then we went on to talk about other things. It wasn’t a big deal.

I had forgotten about our conversation by bedtime on Monday, when he asked to brush my hair. He had been playing me up and I thought it might relax us both so I agreed. It’s not an unusual request, he does fancy himself as a bit of an artist and this is just another opportunity to create. What was unusual is that he clearly had something in mind as he worked. He brushed, and rebrushed, moved to stand in front of me to get my parting just so, saying ‘No no no. Keep still. Turn this way,’ holding my chin to view his work. Finally, he announced, ‘finished!’ My hair had a centre parting and hung a little in my eyes (as much as frizz can). With a satisfied look in his face, Mushroom said, ‘Now you look beautiful. You hair is like your Mummy, see?’ I caught my breath. He had been trying to make me look like my Mum… and for me, that was the most beautiful Mother’s Day moment.

 

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Clearing out the crap

Spring is almost upon us. The weather still seems a little unsure about that but bearing in mind we did have snow last month (remember that?) and we had quite a warm weekend, I think it’s safe to say the season is on its way, and it can’t come soon enough for me!

While I don’t necessarily deep clean the house at this time of year, I do often decide to ‘sort out my wardrobe’ in the spring. Then, once I’ve started on my wardrobe, I tend to start sorting through all my other ‘crap’. I don’t have  a lot of it. Mr B is the hoarder (Oh how I’d love to sort out his stuff!) but even though I have a clear-out at least once a year, I still seem to accumulate enough useless stuff to warrant at least a bit of decluttering. And that’s before I get to work on some of the rubbish Mushroom accumulates that has to be decluttered gradually, so he doesn’t miss his ‘favourite’ (for that week/only when he realises it’s gone) party bag toy/special stick/lump of hardened pay dough…

So, how do I go about clearing out the crap? Well, this infographic on how to declutter your wardrobe from Ecomovers pretty much sums up what I do with my wardrobe as well as all the other crap that seemed important at the time:

EcoMovers_Guide to declutter your wardrobe2

Actually, if you forget the first question and look some of the questions on the right hand side, changing ‘Do you feel good in it’ to ‘does it make you feel good,’ and replace ‘was it expensive’ with ‘does it still serve you?’ Then your answers might help if you’re looking to declutter your mind as well, I think.

I know one of the reasons I like a good clear-out is because it makes me feel good inside to have less crap on the outside. Clearing my stuff helps to clear my mind. However, clearing the crap out of my mind is more of a long game! But as a result of a lot of personal development work over the years (that led me to what I do now, coaching others!) here’s some of the crap I’ve cleared from my mind in the past  five or six years: A belief that everything needed to be done perfectly, a belief that I wasn’t worthy (of a lot of things…), a belief that I should be seen and not heard (relating back to self worth), a belief that I’d never achieve my dreams (so why try to?)… and more. These ideas (and they really were just that, not reality at all) no longer served me, so I let them go. It wasn’t always easy (and there are some days they sneak back up on me) but letting go of them has made life so much better in the long-term.

How about you? Do you spring clean? If you were to clear some of the crap from your mind this year, what would you let go of?

 

Disclosure: In collaboration with EcoMovers. Read my full PR and disclosure policy here.

 

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Conversations with Mushroom #7: A sense of humour

The one where I realise Mushroom has started to develop a real sense of humour… And has learned the art of keeping a straight face.

We’re in the swimming pool changing rooms, getting ready to have a quick swim together before Mushroom’s lesson. I take my jeans and t-shirt off and am ready to go as I had my swimsuit on underneath. Mushroom is half naked.

Mushroom: Come on then.

Me: You’re not ready yet.

Mushroom: No, you’re not ready yet.

Me: What? I mean, why do you say that?

Mushroom: Mummy.  You have to take ALL your clothes off to go swimming!

Me: But Mushroom. Then I’d be naked. *Thinking this is the end of the conversation*

Mushroom: Yes. You have to go naked today. I told you yesterday*

Me: *confused* Why are we having this conversation?

Mushroom: *serious face* Get undressed Mummy, hurry up!

Me:

Mushroom: Your face! Haha Mummy I tricked ya! It’s a JOKE! *cracks up laughing*

 

*’yesterday’ meaning anytime in the past month or two. Or three.

ConversationswithMushroom

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Mushroom shakes his tail feather

Last month, Mushroom and I went to our first ‘family rave.’

Your first what?

Hosted by Big Fish Little Fish and held at venues across London, these family raves are basically mini festivals aimed at families. The aim is for both parents and kids to enjoy the event, which we all did!

The Enchanted Forest

The theme of the rave we went to was the Enchanted forest and there were related crafts for the children to do, as well as face painting, tattoos (temporary of course!) and a professional DJ playing club classics throughout. When we first arrived, Mushroom and I were a little overwhelmed so as his friend Peanut rushed straight in and started to dance straight away, he asked me to hold him while we both took it all in! The lights, club visuals and lighting, everyone waving glowsticks and some of the kids wearing tails.

Mushroom's Owl Mask

Mushroom’s Owl Mask

Chilling

Once Mushroom had warmed up by sitting down to a craft activity, he had a little dance and then said that he needed to ‘get out of here.’ Luckily, there was a chill out room (yes really)! Aimed at babies and perfect for those who are a bit sensitive and need somewhere quieter to go, Mushroom enjoyed playing in the tents dotted around the room and listening to chill out music. It was in this room that we noticed that almost all of the children were wearing tails and realised they were there to be borrowed! Mushroom loves dressing up and his face lit up when he managed to find a tail each for him and Peanut to wear!

Shaking his tail feather

After some downtime and a snack, I asked Mushroom if he wanted to dance and he said that could do ‘the tail feather dance’, which he did. It was perfect timing as it was near the end of the rave and after he and Peanut danced under a giant ‘parachute’, tikker tape rained down on everyone before the bubble machine started and the party wound down.

On the way out we received very welcome complimentary smoothies and snacks courtesy of Happy Monkey and Bear Snacks. We had such a good time that we’re already planning to book our tickets for the October date!

Disclosure: We paid for our tickets to this event, we just enjoyed it so much we wanted to share! Find out more about Big Fish Little Fish events over on their website.

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