All posts by - honestrachael

Mushroom’s microscooter

Posted on: April 17, 2013: Post written by: Rachael

So, This is partly a post about Mushroom ‘graduating from the mini microscooter with a seat, to the older toddler (from age 3, according to the box!) version and partly a post about how kids always seem to want what others have (tell me it’s not just Mushroom)..!

Back in November last year, Mr B and I decided to buy Mushroom a scooter for Christmas. This decision was based on the fact that he repeatedly stole other children’s scooters every time we went to the park. A sound decision, we thought.

He opened it on Christmas day and could not have been more excited. Initially he rode it with the seat but we could see that he would quickly outgrow this (he’s pretty tall). At first, he would only ride it indoors, taking Cloudbabies’ Baba Green (a toy, obviously) for little trips on the back of it from the living room to the kitchen. We often took this version of the scooter to the park and it was hit and miss whether he would ride it outside. I often ended up carrying it. Just as he started to get more confident riding it outside it became clear he had pretty much outgrown it.

In February we took the seat off. Since then, he has so far he has scooted on it twice. Both times indoors. Outside, he prefers to turn it around and push it as though it’s a buggy with an imaginary child in it. Who knows, perhaps that is what is going on in his little head. What perplexes me though, is this: If we come across another child in the park with a scooter – the same scooter, more often that not – then he will still try to steal it and scoot on it. What is that? Anyone? Or is it really just Mushroom?

Mushroom will only scoot on other people's scooters

Disclosure: Just to be clear – this is not a review. Mushroom just happens to have a microscooter and I have linked to the brand to show which one, in case anyone reading likes the look of it and wants to buy one. Microscooters did not request this post and we did not receive payment for it. We do like the brand though. A lot. Read more about my review policy.

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For Best Results Brush Twice Daily (or The Story of Adam and The Tooth Fairy)

Posted on: April 11, 2013: Post written by: Rachael

I recently posted a question on babyhuddle, asking other parents how they get their toddlers to brush their teeth. I had been having trouble with Mushroom lately, who was point blank refusing to let a toothbrush anywhere near his mouth. I did get some useful answers but as with most of these things that seem insurmountable problems at the time, eventually Mushroom started to brush his teeth again and now he even lets me do it probably about every other day. A massive improvement.

Once he started brushing his teeth again and I was no longer concerned about it, I remembered that my brother had a similar issue when he was young (but older than Mushroom – he was about 7). I did nothing about it at the time, but later, when I wrote a series of children’s stories with ‘morals’ – see ‘Do As You’re Told (or The Story of Julia and The Marmalade Monster‘ for a previous example – during my university years, I remembered this and decided to write a cautionary tale especially aimed at little boys who won’t brush their teeth. If you have a toothbrush resistant child, you could try reading them this little story and seeing if it makes a difference – I would love to know if it does!

For Best Results Brush Twice Daily (or The Story of Adam and The Tooth Fairy)

Adam White was a very interesting little (or not so little) nine-year old boy. He had short blond hair and he wore glasses with big metal frames, which emphasised his beautiful big brown eyes. Adam was a very clever child who usually did as he was told. He collected used envelopes (because everyone collects stamps and Adam liked to be original), which he kept in a big photo album on top of the tank where his pet lizard lived. Adam thought it was ridiculous to name a creature you couldn’t talk to, so he just called it ‘Lizard’. Despite being a very clever boy, Adam hated brushing his teeth. In fact, since he could talk, he had refused to brush them. Adam’s parents, being rather simple people, thought that Adam was a genius and that therefore he probably knew best so they left him to it.

On Sunday night after his bath (for Adam was a clean boy in all other respects), Adam got into bed with a good book, and eventually he fell asleep. At around the hour that strange things happen (midnight, of course), Adam felt a tickle on his cheek. He woke up, rubbed his eyes and reached over to his bedside table for his glasses. When he could see, Adam saw the most beautiful woman in the world. She had dark eyes (they appeared to be purple), a pink, smiling mouth and long, wavy brown hair. Adam thought she must be an angel. Then she spoke. “I’m Esmerelda” she said. “I’m a tooth fairy” and then she smiled. A big, open smile that showed all her teeth. All three of them. Adam blinked. This woman’s teeth were disgusting. The three she did have were black, and small, and her gums appeared to be bleeding. Adam changed his mind about wanting to marry her when he grew up (for this is what he had been thinking). “If you’re a tooth fairy” he said, matter-of-factly, “Then why have you got such horrible teeth?” (Adam was a very honest little boy). Esmarelda laughed “You’re a very honest little boy aren’t you?” Adam sighed. Why do grown-ups always have to state the obvious? “I’m in charge of the rejects” she continued “Come with me”. So Adam went (a thought about not being supposed to go with strangers did briefly cross his mind but he quickly dismissed it). Esmerelda took Adam to a castle. A very old, run-down castle with a rusty gate, but a castle nevertheless. There were about 20 children playing in the courtyard. “I don’t understand.,” said Adam “Why aren’t these children at home in bed?” Esmerelda sighed. She was still beautiful as long as she kept her mouth shut. “These children…..” she said, with a sad look in her eyes “…never brush their teeth.” That was the only explanation she gave and then she disappeared. One of the children turned to smile at Adam, and a fly flew out of his mouth, cockroaches and beetles crawled out of another child’s mouth and a third child, who looked just like Adam, laughed. He had no teeth at all, just black gums that were covered in scabs. Adam screamed and found himself sitting bolt upright in bed, his pyjamas damp with sweat.

As soon as he woke up, Adam rushed straight to the bathroom mirror and when he saw that he still had all his teeth and that they weren’t black, or scabby, or gone altogether (although they were very yellow), he brushed them. He brushed his teeth five times and called to his mother to make a dentist’s appointment. When Adam turned back to the mirror, Esmerelda was smiling back at him…. And she had a perfect set of sparkling pearly white teeth.

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Dear Mushroom… You’re two years old!

Posted on: March 20, 2013: Post written by: Rachael

Dear Mushroom,

You turned two last week. You’re growing into such a lovely little boy and you surprise me all the time with things you do and say. I wonder how old are you now, as you read this? I assume you’re reading because you’d like to know what you were like when you were two. Well…

You are adventurous but cautious with it. You will try any new foods without complaint and even when you’re afraid of something (the wooden bridge at the park, the teddy bear that sings Cliff Richard songs – you have Grandma to thank for that! – and the really high slide at soft play) you will still approach it and give it a go. I admire that about you. Just last week you mastered the wooden bridge – you stood at the start shaking with fear and I repeatedly told you it was ok to get down and try another day. ‘No!’ You said, determined to overcome your fear. After several attempts you eventually walked all the way across without help. You were so proud of yourself. I love your tenacity and I hope you continue to have this approach throughout your life. It took me years to ‘feel the fear and do it anyway,’ this seems to be something that’s just a part of you.

What else? You are so very loving. You often cuddle and kiss me and Daddy, and your friends, and sometimes their Mums too, if you know them well enough. You’re cautious around strangers but curious and polite, and if you decide you like someone you don’t hold back in showing it. You’re very sensitive to others’ feelings and sometimes you become distressed if someone else is upset. This is a sign of emotional intelligence and will help you to build lasting and loving relationships in the future but I hope that we are helping you to understand that although it’s important to be sensitive to other people’s feelings, you must put yourself first and you don’t need to ‘fix’ them. You can try to help them feel better – I’ve seen you do this at nursery by offering a teddy to a crying child. I’ve also seen you hide under a chair when a child cannot be consoled. Sometimes people just need to feel what they’re feeling. Eventually it will pass. I wish I could explain all this to you right now, but I can’t. For now I can just wipe away your tears and reassure you. So far, it seems to work. You believe that magic kisses can cure all ills and that Mummy and Daddy can fix anything. We can’t, we’re only human too but we’ll let you believe that a little while longer.

You love to talk but your vocabulary is limited. Sometimes this frustrates you but you’ve become very good at ‘explaining’ what you mean without using words. Most of the time we can figure out what you’re saying. You say some things as one word although they’re two or more -‘watdat?’ meaning ‘what’s that?’ and ‘eeyar’ meaning ‘here you are.’ Your favourite words at the moment are ‘bubble,’ which is also one of my favourite words) ‘car,’ ‘more,’ meaning ‘again’ as well as ‘more,’ and ‘no!’ You have just started to say ‘apple,’ and you now call all fruits either apples or bananas. I think you tried to say strawberry last week  but you’ve not said it since so I’m not sure. I can’t wait for you to start putting whole sentences together. The longest sentence you’ve said so far is ‘Mummy, up!’ Memorable because it was my birthday and you were refusing my request a lie-in. I don’t mind getting up early really though, it won’t be long before I have trouble getting you out of bed, I’m sure!

You have a great sense of humour and you already think you’re a bit of a comedian. The other day I filmed you having a mini tantrum. You didn’t notice at the time and it quickly passed. Later, I played the clip back to you. You smiled slyly and said nothing. Later, you called me ‘Mummy, mummy.’ You put on a mock angry face and, half smiling, you started to stamp and shake your head ‘Mushroom (said) nonononono!’ Then you stopped and fell about laughing. You were impersonating yourself. It was hilarious. We both ended up sitting on the floor laughing as you did it again a couple of times and then sighed ‘Mushroom… no..’ you giggled and went back to your toys. I expect you will start impersonating me soon and perhaps that will be less amusing!

You’re interests are pretty much the same as they were at 17 months – you like:

Bikes – we got you a balance bike for your birthday and you were so excited, shouting ‘bike!’ at Daddy repeatedly while he put it together. You were pretty good on it straight away but much like your scooter, you’re less keen on riding it outside so far
Motorbikes.
Scooters – you now have one of your own but haven’t quite mastered the art of riding it yet (I expect this will make for a future blog post!)
Cars
Trains
Aeroplanes and helicopters…

It’s not all about transport though…

You still love music and dancing…
Cooking and cleaning (real and pretend!)
Making things with Play-doh
Drawing and painting…

And finally, you also love

Animals – You prefer cats to dogs and….
People – You’re more shy now and spend more time watching people but once you warm up there’s no stopping you. You recently made Daddy late for a night out because you insisted his friend sit on the stairs with you for a ‘chat.’ He was so charmed by you that he stayed another half hour.

I’m sure there’s a lot more to be said but these are the things that come to mind right now. I wouldn’t say that they define you – as I have no idea what goes on in your head – but they give a good picture of the you that I know at the moment. I look forward to seeing who you become over the years and supporting you along your way to adulthood and beyond (if you’ll let me!).

With love as always,

Mummy Xx

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Louise – A Mummy Plus interview

Posted on: March 20, 2013: Post written by: Rachael

Back in the summer of 2012, when the UK was caught up in the excitement of the London 2012 Olympics, I launched a series of Mummy Plus interviews. To find out more about why I started these interviews, pop back to August 2012 and read my first interview, which was with Helen. Helen was a Mummy Plus Games Maker for London 2012 and in her interview, she shared her experience of being a volunteer and how she juggled the hours with the inevitable childcare challenges. I did put a call out for more Mummy (and Daddy!) Plus interviewees at the time but if I’m honest, I didn’t put that much time and effort into it.

This year, I’ve decided to revive the Mummy Plus interviews again. This time round I plan to interview someone every couple of months. You don’t need to be a Mummy or Daddy blogger to take part, you just need to be responsible for at least 60% of your child’s care, and tell us what you do/who you are when you’re not being Mummy or Daddy.

To kickstart the series, I caught up with Owner/Manager of Tatty Bumpkin South East Oxfordshire, Louise Steele. Tatty Bumpkin is a franchise and Louise purchased South East Oxfordshire as a territory in May 2012. The business provides yoga-inspired sessions for children – where adventures centre around the awesomely named Wobble Farm and Giggle Tree – Baby Yoga and Baby Massage. Louise has practiced yoga herself for the last 10 years. She also enjoys music, walking and cycling. In addition to this, Louise is also Mum to a beautiful four-year-old girl. Before Louise started her own business with Tatty Bumpkin, she lived and worked in London. She was a booking agent at Coda Music Agency, and before that Sony Music UK, where she represented a roster of artists including Calvin Harris, Adam Ant, Cold Specks and The Wave Pictures, booking their touring and their festival appearances across the UK, Europe, Asia and Australia.

What was your greatest challenge at work, then?
When I became a mum in 2008 coping with the hours demanded in the music industry became very difficult. The live music industry is not very mum-friendly and although my company did make an effort to support me I was one of a small handful of women who were mothers and agents. The industry definitely lacks female role models (especially those with children) for young women to look up to and aspire to be like. I wanted to be the best agent I could be and also the best mum and that was very difficult to balance. I also think I cared too much – you need a really thick skin to survive in that world! My bands were great but I took on a lot of responsibility for them and found it difficult to switch off when outside the office. It was very much a 24/7 job all year round.

What made you decide to set up your own business? 
I had been thinking I might have to change my career to fit in with family life as it was becoming increasingly difficult to juggle the two. I needed flexibility with working hours, independence from an office environment (and London) and a challenge, so starting my own business gave me these choices.

Louise being Mummy!

Tell us more about Tatty Bumpkin
Tatty Bumpkin is a franchise (see: www.tattybumpkin.com ), which operates throughout the UK. I discovered it in March last year and attended one of their free ‘Discovery Days’. I was happy to find out S.E Oxfordshire was available, completed my training in May and started the business that June. It was all a bit of a whirlwind and happened so quickly but I fell in love with the company and it’s ethos and it just felt exactly the right thing for me to do next. It enabled me to move from London back to the countryside (which meant better school options for my daughter) and also choose my working hours to fit in with childcare. It captured my eye because of the name and the graphics/logo and as I read more I found it was heavily grounded in child development and after studying psychology at university had an interest in returning to work in this area. I now offer Tatty Bumpkin and Baby Bumpkin sessions privately, in nurseries, Children’s Centres, primary schools, parties, fetes, etc. throughout S.E Oxfordshire and employ a teacher to help me cover this. I am actually looking to recruit another teacher shortly too. The sessions follow the adventures of Tatty Bumpkin or Baby Bumpkin on Wobble Farm and incorporate simple yoga postures into the story in a fun, imaginative way encouraging movement and enhancing development in the children. It is fantastic for increasing self-confidence in children and sessions can be adapted for special needs and even taught one-to-one.

You moved from London to Oxford in 2012 Why Oxford? 
I have family in the area as I was brought up and went to school about 20 miles from here. I wanted to return to the countryside for my daughter’s sake (schools and green spaces!) and also to be closer to family for both of us. Plus the franchise was available so a new, more child-friendly, career was a possibility here. We also needed to be close to London for family reasons.

How do you find Oxford after the fast-paced life of London? Do you ever miss the city?
Actually that’s one of the reasons I moved – to slow down! If you’d had asked me if I missed London three months ago I’d have said no… but now, yes, a little. Although I can be in West London in less than an hour so I visit a lot and actually appreciate it more for that reason I think. Oxford is beautiful with lots of culture but I still have a lot of friends in London and visit often.

How do you manage childcare when you’re working?
My daughter goes to nursery four days a week and is about to start school in September. I am lucky now in that 90% of my work is when she is at nursery/during school hours.

How do you ‘switch off’ when you’re not working?
Spending time with my daughter, practicing yoga and watching films. I also like reading, walking, cooking…. and there is lots more time for all this since changing my career and moving from London!

What’s your biggest challenge at work now…?
I always knew running a business was going to be hard work but I think the biggest challenge is constantly being motivated when working from home, alone. It’s very different to being in an office with colleagues around you for advice/encouragement. I am very lucky as head office are very supportive and I have a wonderful neighbouring franchisee in Oxford who is always only a phone call away (as are any of the others nationally – it’s been a very supportive experience).

If money was no object, what would you do with your time? 
I’d travel the world (in school holidays with my daughter of course!). So many places I’d still love to go…. Nepal, Tibet, India, Africa… And then in between holidays whilst my daughter was at school I’d like to do more work with a fantastic charity called Kids Company. Camila Batmanghelidjh and her team are doing an incredible thing, changing children’s lives in London and beyond so I’d donate my time to them and perhaps help them expand outside London.

If you had to describe your daughter in just three words, what would you say?
Vivacious. Kind. Thoughtful.

And finally…

Complete the sentence: ‘I’m a Mummy Plus…’ in no more than 40 words (including these ones).
‘I’m a Mummy Plus… Owner and Manager of Tatty Bumpkin S.E Oxfordshire, lover of yoga (Vinyasa Flow), gig/festival-goer and avid bookworm.  I used to live in the world of music but now it’s a passion rather than a job.

If you enjoyed this interview, and have more questions you would like to ask Louise, please leave a comment below or email me, and I will pass them on.

If you would like to take part in a Mummy/Daddy Plus interview, either leave a comment below, email me or DM me on twitter. If you’re a bit shy but know of someone else you feel is a Mummy/Daddy Plus, let me know why you think they should be interviewed and pass on their contact details so that I can get in touch.

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Kelloggs launch lower sugar range

Posted on: March 09, 2013: Post written by: Rachael

My personal favourite cereals growing up were Weetabix’ Alpen muesli – Original, not the low sugar version (I don’t think it existed back then!) and Kellogg’s Coco Pops. Both of these are pretty high in sugar and all that other nasty stuff we’re not supposed to be feeding our children. I still eat them both (less of the Coco Pops). I also eat sugary sweets and full fat Coke (If I’m going to drink Coca-Cola I may as well go all out). I’m an adult though, and therefore aware of the crap I’m putting into my body. I try to be better with Mushroom. Sugar did not pass his lips until he turned one. He had a chocolate cupcake that day (he ate the whole thing at once and grinned) and now has such things occasionally and understands that they’re treats (Coco Pops included). So, when Kellogg’s got in touch to say they were launching four new wholegrain cereals, with a lower sugar content (low enough that they can now advertise on Children’s TV) I was interested. I accepted the offer of a box of each to try.

Kelloggs' four new cereals

The first thing I did was look at the nutritional information. I won’t list it all here but one average, each of the above cereals have (per 30g serving) around 113 calories, between 5 and 9g sugar and  the salt ranges from 0.1 – 0.42g (Honey Loops – guilty). I compared these to Rice Krispies (115 calories, 3g sugar and 0.3g salt) and Mushroom’s current favourite – Weetabix’ Ready Brek (112 calories, 0.3g sugar and less than 0.10g salt). It’s not that different! However, I looked up the nutritional information for Coco Pops and found (116 calories, 0.8g fat and 11g sugar)! So although nutritionally, the clear winner here is Mushroom’s favourite, the new cereals are marginally healthier than other sugary/chocolate covered cereals out there. Looking into this has made me think more about what Mushroom eats for breakfast but as some days he just has a banana, I think we’re getting it about right.

So… The new cereals. Well, despite the makeover, they still have a fairly high sugar and salt content so they would be more of a treat for Mushroom but we tasted them all over the course of a week (both with milk for breakfast and dry, as a snack), and here’s what we thought:

Mushroom takes the taste test very seriously

Mushroom takes the taste test very seriously

Honey Loops
Yum Yum* score: 2
Dry taste test: He liked the crunch but tried a few others before coming back to these ones.
With milk test: He refused to have these with milk until today, when he swiped some from my bowl! He asked for more.
Mummy score: I like that they stay crunchy. They are very sweet, but I like that about them so 8/10

Coco Pops Croc Prints
Yum Yum score: 3
Dry taste test: He ate one of these, his eyes widened, he tried something else (a Honey Pop) and went back to the Croc Prints, eating them all.
With milk test: He liked them at first but as they started to go soggy he spat them out!
Mummy score: Not keen on these at all. I agree with Mushroom that they go soggy far to quickly but they are too chocolatey for me to start with, I think. 4/10

Rice Krispies Multigrain Shapes (Strawberry flavour)
Yum Yum score: 2
Dry taste test: He ate one, frowned and spent some time examining the next. Something then ‘clicked’ I guess, as he nodded, said ‘Yeah,’ and slowly ate another before moving on
With milk test: He wouldn’t have them with milk
Mummy score: Not keen on the strawberry flavouring (it’s my least favourite milkshake flavour, which is effectively what you get in the end…). They taste alright with milk but I have to eat them while they’re still crunchy. 6/10

Honey Pops
Yum Yum score: 1
Dry taste test: Again, he liked the crunch. Dry, he preferred these to the loops.
With milk test: He enjoyed these and occasionally asks for them after eating his fill of porridge
Mummy score: I like these, they remind me of a cereal I used to eat when I was younger and they stay fairly crunchy too. 7/10

Verdict:

While the Coco Pops Croc Prints were a clear winner in the dry taste tests, Mushroom made the most appreciate noises while eating the Honey Loops. This was the only time he asked for more. However, at the end of the week I let him choose his own cereal. What did he pick? The Ready Brek. And he asked for fruit. I guess he knows what his body needs! I, on the other hand, have been eating the Honey Loops and they have nearly all gone (I think Mr B likes these too so it’s not just me)! I’m sure Mushroom will ask for the others at some point, and I will continue to give them as dry snacks sometimes as they are very handy for that… I’d recommend them all but I’ll be giving them more as an occasional treat rather than an everyday breakfast cereal.

If you would like try the new cereals for yourself, then you’re in luck! Kellogg’s have given Mushroom and I a box of each for one lucky winner. It’s enough cereal to keep you going for some time! To win, just add a comment in the box below telling me what your favourite childhood cereal was and what your child(ren) usually eat for breakfast. The winner will be picked at random – I’m just nosy curious! The competition closes on Friday 29 March.

*Very scientific this, it’s the number of times Mushroom says ‘Yum yum,’ while eating.

Disclosure: We were sent four free boxes of cereal (one of each in the new range) and asked for feedback. Writing a blog post was optional. Opinions are mine (Mushroom’s Mum) and Mushroom’s own. Kellogg’s are providing the four free boxes for the competition. Read my full PR and disclosure policy here. 

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Nurturing a nest egg for Mushroom’s future

Posted on: March 08, 2013: Post written by: Rachael

Hands up who likes thinking about finance? No? Me neither. It’s one of those tedious tasks that always gets pushed to the bottom of my ‘to-do’ list. I know some of you might love numbers and thinking about interest rates and the like is an enjoyable pastime for you (my brother is one of these people. He finds creativity in numbers. I just don’t ‘get’ it) but me? No. In true 1950s housewife style, I usually ask my husband about these things.* It’s not that I’m completely ignorant, I just need someone to explain things to me in a really simple way before I get it.

Spring, traditionally a time of rebirth and all that, tends to be a good time for me to dust away the cobwebs and start giving some thought to my future. This year my thoughts are on future finances. I know I need to write a will. Thirty-*coughs and mumbles* might seem young to be considering this, but sometimes people go before they expect to and as my Mum didn’t have a will, I know the extra grief this can cause for those left behind. I, however, fully expect to live a long life so I also need to review my pension, to make sure Mushroom doesn’t grow up thinking he needs to provide for me in my old age. I need to make sure I have enough funds to look after myself, so that he can get on with the business of living his life.

It’s all rather grown-up, isn’t? Enough to give me a headache anyway. So, I’m starting with thinking about Mushroom’s future. Mr B did plenty of research when Mushroom was born, and we decided very early on to open a high interest savings account that will transfer to adult status when he turns 16, unless we decide to continue being trustees – which, to be honest, we probably will for a bit. Who’s ready for a windfall at 16? However, we do pay tax on the interest on this account. This year, I’ve been thinking about adding to this, after all, perhaps it’s best not to have all Mushroom’s (nest) eggs in one basket (I know, I know, I can hear you groaning from here). So, when the lovely people at moneysupermarket.com got in touch to ask if I’d be interested in having a look at their Junior ISA infographic, the timing could not have been better.

What’s an infographic?

‘A graphic visual representations of information, data or knowledge intended to present complex information quickly and clearly’ (thanks, Wikipedia)

Basically, it’s an ‘idiots guide’ in picture form. Here’s the one about Junior ISAs:

iNFOG_-_JUNIOR_ISAS2

Having had a good look at this, it really does simplify the complicated world (to me) of finance into something that I understand. There are pros and cons of taking out a junior ISA so I’m still undecided as to whether I will do this, but seeing as I found the above useful, I thought perhaps you might too…

If you are considering taking out an ISA for your chicks this Easter (They’re coming thick and fast today, huh? Maybe I should be a comedian. I’m wasted here), then now is the time to do so as the new tax year starts on  6 April.

How are you providing for your childrens’ future? Have you got savings/ISAs/something else? If not, what are you thinking of doing? I’d love to hear different ideas as, like I said, I am still undecided! Do leave a comment below.

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Mushroom’s guide to making friends

Posted on: March 01, 2013: Post written by: Rachael

I was over at Sarah Pylas‘ blog, Grenglish, last week, reading her lovely post, Best Friends, about how her son will be separated from his current best friends when he starts school in September. I commented that Mushroom was soon to move up to the toddler room (my baby’s no longer a baby!) at nursery and wondered how much he would miss his best buddy from the baby room, who’s a couple of months younger than him. Sarah reminded me how fickle they are at this young age, and reassured me that Mushroom would find it easy to make new friends. Of course, she was right. In fact, the first ‘settling in’ day in his new room at nursery, Mushroom was supposed to return to the baby room after his nap. He was led to the door, and he just stood there and frowned. Eventually, he was asked whether he wanted to go back to the toddler room, at which he nodded enthusiastically and ran off to play. So much for missing his best buddy.

Mushroom and one of his current 'best' friends

All this got me thinking about all the friends he’s made so far, including those that have lasted just the duration of an afternoon at the park, and how he goes about the business of making friends. The result was this simple guide – from Mushroom’s perspective – on how to make friends.

  • Meet someone you like the look of. Age unimportant. One of my favourite (non-family) friends is about 100 (he’s probably about 60 Mushroom – Mum). The first time we met he showed me how to put a leaf on a stick. He’s a genius
  • Go up to them and smile. Say something. It doesn’t matter what/whether they understand or not
  • If you get a positive response, you could try and give them cuddle. Warning: Not everyone likes this. Don’t go in too quick
  • Follow them around, mimic them a bit (not too much! You have to do your own thing a bit, too. Don’t lose yourself). Then try to get them to follow you.
  • Offer to share your snack with them.
  • If you’d like to see them again, try and get your Mum/Dad to make friends with their Mum/Dad. If you can’t talk yet, I find talking loudly and pointing wildly helps. But it doesn’t matter if you don’t see them again, the most important thing is to have fun
  • Wave and blow kisses when you/your friend has to leave. It doesn’t matter if they don’t see, it’s the thought that counts. If you really liked them it’s ok to cry. Best to let it out in the moment rather than dwell on it later.

Mushroom, like most toddlers, sees every child he meets – in the park, in the supermarket, in the street – as a potential new friend. He’s more shy with adults and defers to me before approaching new grown-ups but still sees them all the same way. I think this is a lovely way to look at the world and wonder if there come a point when as adults we – consciously or unconsciously – decide that we have ‘enough’ friends and stop making the effort. What do you think…?

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Things Mushroom *might* be asking…

Posted on: February 15, 2013: Post written by: Rachael

Earlier this month, I read a great post by Leoarna (from Not different but interesting) over at babyhuddle.   The title, ‘Things my daughter would ask me if she could,’ is pretty self explanatory. Leoarna imagined herself on the panel at Question Time, with her almost-four-year-old daughter asking questions from the audience. The questions are great – some I’m sure we all ask ourselves at times, and Leoarna’s answers are considered and honest. Go and have a read of it and them come back (please). I’ll wait for you. Shall I put the kettle on?

You came back! Thanks. Here’s a cuppa.

Is herbal tea ok..?

Ok, I’m not going to try and write anything as deep as what you’ve just read, but I am going to Kind of ‘steal’ Leonara’s idea (hope that’s ok!). My angle is more like that of Redpeffer’s recent laugh-out-loud blog post, ‘A morning in the life of my two year old.’  I have just discoved Redpeffer’s blog via Britmums, and will be back for more!

If you’ve been following me, you may have read last month’s post ‘Look who’s talking,’ about Mushroom’s limited vocabulary. So, I often imagine what he’s asking me (if I can’t figure out what he’s actually saying) and then answer that.  It makes for some curious conversations…

Mushroom (upon waking): ‘Oh no! Dee dee boo, duck!’ (Starts lifting covers and throwing pillow out of cot). ‘Mummy, duck?’ (more urgently)
My translation: I dreamed that I lost my duck! Help me find it!
My answer: That’s a funny dream! I think your ducks are in the bathroom though, they sleep there don’t they?
Mushroom’s response: Confused face. ‘No, Mummy…’ (Sighs and gives up no the whole duck thing.) ‘Up!’ Starts trying to climb out of cot.

Mushroom: ‘Banana!’ (Points to fruit bowl)
My translation: Can I have a banana? (a reasonable guess, right? I thought so)
My answer: ‘Of course you can. Here you go.’ (Hands over banana)
Mushroom’s response: ‘No!’ Cries hysterically. (Turns out he wanted an apple, which he can say. Hmmm)

Mushroom: Points and CD player (kept under the TV) and dances a little. ‘Mummy? Peas?’
My translation: I want to listen to music and dance. Can you put some music on please?
My answer: ‘You want music? (nods enthusiastically) ‘Ok, let’s dance.’ (I put a CD on)
Mushroom’s response: ‘No!’ Throws himself dramatically on the sofa and cries (turns out he wanted to watch his Baby Einstein Baby Beethoven dvd. Took a while to get to that one! He did dance to it though. That was new)

Mushroom: As we walk along the street ‘Mummy, duck! Da da dee teef… lalala (singing) a, b…. one… Mummy, woo woo?’
My translation: ‘Do dogs ride bikes Mummy? With their teeth?’
My answer: No Mushroom, not usually. Although we might be able to find something on Youtube.’
Mushroom’s response:’…’ (A long sideways look and silence for the next five minutes)

Mushroom: Whinging ‘Maaaameeee. Dar, dar?’ (signs ‘car’)
My translation: Are we getting a lift with our friends to go to swimming this morning?’
My answer: ‘Yes we are. They’ll be here in a minute so we had better get ready
Mushrrom’s response: ‘Yeah!’ (runs off to get shoes). Yeah, sometimes I get it right.

Perhaps I will come up with some more serious questions – like: ‘Why must you change my nappy as soon as its dirty?’ ‘Why can’t I cut my own apple with that super sharp knife?’ and ‘Why can’t I eat the soap?’ next time…

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Spreading the love on Valentine’s Day

Posted on: February 14, 2013: Post written by: Rachael

Today, Mushroom and I spent the morning making Valentine’s gifts for Mr B.

We (well Mushroom really) made a lovely picture:

Work in progress

Then we made red velvet cupcakes for our afternoon snack:


 Sweetheart cupcakes

As well as an enormous cake, just for Mr B!

The way to a man's heart...

And, for the rest of this month, I’ll be paying it forward by doing random acts of kindness on a daily basis. Want to join me (links to my other blog – this is me too!)?

What did you get up to this Valentine’s Day? Do comment and include any links below so I can check out your photos too!

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On not being perfect

Posted on: February 03, 2013: Post written by: Rachael

I recently discovered Guilty Mum‘s brand new blog, which is based on the notion that most mums feel guilty about most things, most of the time. According to one of Guilty Mum’s posts from last month, the top ten reasons for feeling guilty include working/not working, going out/not going out, breastfeeding/not breastfeeding, sending your child to nursery/not sending… You get the picture, we’re damned if we do and we’re damned if we don’t. But let’s face it, being a parent is tough and although we often complain about being judged by others, we are are own harshest judges. Remember before you had kids? Didn’t you judge that Mum in the supermarket, giving her toddler a chocolate bar just to shut him up? Or that Mum who let her daughter watch TV for over an hour while she chatted on the phone to you? Well, that’s you now, that is. Or maybe not, but my point is that whatever you may have thought you would do as a parent, now that you are one, it’s unlikely you completely measure up to your own high standards of parenthood. So, don’t we all feel a bit guilty then, for just not being perfect?

Well in 1953, paediatrician and psychoanalyst David Winnicot developed a theory called the ‘Good enough Mother.’ I could explain it here, or quote Winnicot himself, but instead I had a look around and found this article by Sheila Quirke (‘Mary Tyler Mom’), which covers it all much more eloquently than I ever could. To sum up, in Sheila’s words:

“Embrace the concept of “Good Enough.” Breathe it in, breathe it out. Let it wrap around you and soothe your tired, worried, guilty soul. You will fail your child. You will. It will happen. Some of us do it daily. Some more spectacularly than others. What Winnicott tells us though, assures us from his mid-century psychoanalytic throne, is that it is okay. Everything is going to be okay.”

So, in keeping with this theme, I have a challenge for you! List the top five reasons you’re less than perfect. Then – and here’s the hard part – list five reasons why you’re good enough. You can relate the first to the second but you don’t have to, it’s completely up to you. I’ll go first:

I’m not perfect because…

  1. I let Mushroom watch too much TV (more on this in a future post!)
  2. I let Mushroom eat chocolate and sweets occasionally
  3. Mr B and I are not always consistent with discipline
  4. I shower myself before getting Mushroom dressed. Every day. An Aunt commented on this and that’s when the guilt started
  5. If Mushroom cries in the night I bring him into our bed rather than settle him back to sleep, thus teaching him independence. I also cuddle him to sleep almost every night :-/

I’m good enough because…

  1. He doesn’t watch adverts (if I can help it) and I (usually) watch TV with him. Mr B says we don’t watch much TV at all (I’m not sure what his benchmark is though). We have learned a lot of Makaton sign language from watching CBeebies ‘Something Special’ together
  2. He eats much more fruit and veg and is really the least fussy toddler I know when it comes to food. He’ll try anything, even raw lemon (he told me that was ‘hot’! I think he wasn’t keen but he ate it anyway)
  3. Mushroom knows the rules, and when he’s ‘getting away’ with something. Perhaps that’s consistent enough
  4. He (usually) plays happily while I shower, which only takes 5-10 minutes (try telling that to pre-baby me!) and it means I can completely focus on him once I’m dressed. It also helps us get out of the house on time
  5. That’s somewhere between teaching independence and attachment parenting right? So either way I’m halfway ‘right’ (whatever that means). And it’s not every night…

Your turn! Either submit a comment via the box below, or write your own blog and either put the link in a comment, tweet or DM me so I can come over and comment on your blog! If you tweet, please tweet @Mushroomsmum (that’s me!) and @GuiltyMumUK too.

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