Despite owning a t-shirt Grandma got me from Jamaica that says I’m the boss, no-one else seems to have got the memo so I am not in charge of Mushroom mansions. If I were, things would be very different.
Different how? So glad you asked. Here’s my manifesto (to which I may add items at any time between now and when I take my rightful position):
There will be no buttons
On anything, ever. I don’t like them. Mummy keeps asking why/what it is about them I don’t like. Stop asking and just accept it. I do not like buttons. They are just wrong.
Breakfast will be whatever I want it to be
If I want an ice cream for breakfast. Give it to me. I’ll have a flake and raspberry sauce with it too. And no, I won’t brush my teeth afterwards.
Same goes for lunch and dinner
I’ll eat anything really but I particularly like chicken, chocolate, noodles and olives. If I want them all on the same plate that’s up to me. What’s that? It might make me sick? Well, how will I learn if you don’t let me make mistakes?
Let me climb it
It doesn’t matter how high or dangerous it is, let me climb it. Just stay close enough to catch me when I fall
I will do my cutting and sticking with big scissors and superglue
Because I CAN. Really, I can. Just let me show you.
There will be no naps
I don’t need one. Seriously, just because my eyes are closing and I am whining a bit it doesn’t mean I’m tired. I have things to do, people to see. DON’T PUT ME DOWN! I’M NOT TIRED I’M NOT TIR…. ZZzzzz Hey, what happened?
There will be no bedtime
Just leave me to do what I’m doing. It’s important. I’ll sleep eventually. Maybe.
One day I will implement this. I promise. We just need to show the grown-ups who’s really in charge. Honest Toddler, are you with me?
[Photo credits: “Buttons’ by Suat Eman and “Mt. Fuji, Japan by Worakit Sirijinda at freedigitalphotos.net]