Posts with category - Mushroom’s mouth

Big boys don’t cry | From Mushroom’s mouth

Yes, they do. Big boys cry big tears. Big fat hot salty tears that make your face all wet and sticky and – importantly – make you feel better when you’re done. There are a few grown-ups who would feel much better about life if they just had a good cry about all the crap they’ve dealt with over the years instead of stewing in it. Go on, let it all out. Then move on. I know it’s hard though, especially if you’re a man and you’re concerned about what people will think.

I’m only three and already I’ve lost count of the number of people who have told me ‘big boys don’t cry,’ when I am upset about something. First of all: Yes, I am big. I am three. But I’m not that big! Mummy only just took away my dummy (I’m not an idiot. Dummy fairy? Please. But I was ready. Sort of) and I’m not even at school yet. I still don’t have all the words I need to describe my feelings (and even if I did sometimes they are just too big to deal with in the moment) so I cry to release them. Sometimes I lash out and hit but I’ve been told that is not okay so what am I supposed to do? Swallow my feelings deep down somewhere so that they can bubble up later on? Add them to the mix of hormones and parental resentment I’m told comes during my teenage years? That doesn’t sound healthy to me.

This is not me. But I feel his pain. There is no need to hide your tears.

This is not me. But I feel his pain. There is no need to hide your tears.

To that guy who told me  was ‘crying over nothing.’ Did you ask? It might seem like nothing to you but it was something to me. And besides, it was none of your business. Judging by the look Mummy gave you, I’m surprised you were still standing after that to be honest. I’m not going to tell you why I was crying that day but generally, I cry for a whole lot of reasons: I’m hurt, I’m scared, I’m exhausted, I’m hungry (ok, I can say when I’m hungry but sometimes I’m so tired I don’t realise it), I can’t understand why I can’t have a lollipop for breakfast/stick my finger in the plug socket (it’s just the right size!)/play with the oven… Or I just don’t feel right. So I cry. And then I get on with life. Or fall asleep. 

I don’t care what you think (yet – so be mindful of the messages you’re sending). Big Boys DO cry. And it helps.

This post was inspired by a recent post over at Redpeffer, on gender stereotyping.

Photo credit: David Castillo Dominici at


Mushroom’s mouth | My first interview

It’s my birthday soon. Yay! I am very excited as this year I will be having a Tiny Mites party. I love singing and dancing so it’s perfect for me.

Mummy’s birthday was last week and it was Grandma’s the week before but they’re not important as they are too old for parties (although we did go out for dinner for Grandma’s birthday. I liked that as I got to see all my cousins so I behaved myself. Mummy said I did very well).

Because I am so very important… And big. I am bigger than Mummy now. She disagrees but I don’t think she understand what BIG means, really… I did an interview for you. Mummy came up with the questions so I could tell you all even more about me. Because you’re surely more interested in me than her, right? So I expect more comments than she got for her recent Mummy meme (meme. That’s a funny word). Anyway, here you go:

How old are you?

One *laughing*


No. I two.

When is your birthday?

Another day. Not today.

What are you doing for your birthday?

Party!!! I Tiny Mites! I dancing! *shaking hips*

Why do you like Tiny Mites so much?

Music Mummy. Dancing. *sighs*

What’s your favourite colour?

Blue. *side eye*



Blue or Red?

Blue. Red…. Red.

What’s your favourite shape?


What does ‘I love you’ mean?

I love you Mummy! *hugs tightly* I happy! Mummy happy?

What is love?

*covers eyes and whispers a girl’s name*

What’s your favourite TV programme?

Bubble Guppies! Gruffalo!

What’s your favourite activity?


What do you like to do best at the park?

Run! Slide, this this: Wheeeeeee!

Do you like sleeping?

No! I not tired!

How old is Mummy?

One. *laughing*

…and Daddy?

One. *hysterical laughter*

What do you like best about nursery days?

Playing! Friends! Painting. Sticking… X (keyworker). X is my friend. He have crisps today.

What do you like best about days at home with Mummy?



Make cakes. Park. See Peanut… and Strawberry!*

Note from MushroomsMum: I totally stole the interview idea from another blogger, having seen her son’s interview last year but I can’t remember who! If it was you, apologies for stealing your style. Please let me know so I can credit you! Thanks.

*Peanut and Strawberry are friends from before nursery days… Peanut’s Daddy is a Daddy Plus… And here’s a photo of Mushroom and Strawberry playing together.



Mushroom’s manifesto | From Mushroom’s mouth

Despite owning a t-shirt Grandma got me from Jamaica that says I’m the boss, no-one else seems to have got the memo so I am not in charge of Mushroom mansions. If I were, things would be very different.

Different how? So glad you asked. Here’s my manifesto (to which I may add items at any time between now and when I take my rightful position):

There will be no buttons
On anything, ever. I don’t like them. Mummy keeps asking why/what it is about them I don’t like. Stop asking and just accept it. I do not like buttons. They are just wrong.

No. Just no.

No. Just no.

Breakfast will be whatever I want it to be
If I want an ice cream for breakfast. Give it to me. I’ll have a flake and raspberry sauce with it too. And no, I won’t brush my teeth afterwards.

Same goes for lunch and dinner
I’ll eat anything really but I particularly like chicken, chocolate, noodles and olives. If I want them all on the same plate that’s up to me. What’s that? It might make me sick? Well, how will I learn if you don’t let me make mistakes?

Yeah it's a mountain. I aim high. Just make sure you're there to catch me, ok?

Yeah it’s a mountain. I aim high. Just make sure you’re there to catch me, ok?

Let me climb it
It doesn’t matter how high or dangerous it is, let me climb it. Just stay close enough to catch me when I fall

I will do my cutting and sticking with big scissors and superglue
Because I CAN. Really, I can. Just let me show you.

There will be no naps
I don’t need one. Seriously, just because my eyes are closing and I am whining a bit it doesn’t mean I’m tired. I have things to do, people to see. DON’T PUT ME DOWN! I’M NOT TIRED I’M NOT TIR…. ZZzzzz Hey, what happened?

There will be no bedtime
Just leave me to do what I’m doing. It’s important. I’ll sleep eventually. Maybe.

One day I will implement this. I promise. We just need to show the grown-ups who’s really in charge. Honest Toddler, are you with me?



[Photo credits: “Buttons’ by Suat Eman and “Mt. Fuji, Japan by Worakit Sirijinda at]


Happy New Year! | From Mushroom’s mouth

Hello again,

Mummy’s a bit miserable at the moment as she didn’t quite achieve everything she’d planned for this year – see her New Year’s post over at Honest Speaks: No promises, no resolutions. See? Blah blah blah. So I’m taking over here.

I didn’t plan to achieve ANYTHING this year so of course I have surpassed all expectations. Yay me! Mummy’s yearly email from Future Me listed all the things she thought she would achieve (she did achieve some of them actually, she’ll realise this later) as well as her hopes for me. So I’ll start with that.

Mummy hoped I would be potty trained by now…. Check. I am even dry at night now – no more nappies, woo hoo!

Mummy wondered if I would be speaking a bit more – enough to hold a ‘proper’ conversation…. Check. Actually there was nothing wrong with my conversation before, she just wasn’t listening hard enough but now that I have more actual words to play with she pays more attention and is starting to realise just how insightful and hilarious I am. Seriously. I’m sure she’ll share her thoughts on this soon enough.

Mummy wondered whether I’d be able to say ‘I love you’ by now…. Check. Actually, I can say ‘I love you’ and ‘sorry.’ Gets me out of a whole heap of trouble that does. Useful things, these words…

Mummy wondered whether I’d be able to ride my balance bike properly… Check. I leave her in the dust! I am now learning to pedal at nursery (we have nothing with pedals on at home. Nothing. *sigh*). I’m getting there and soon I’ll be demanding asking for a proper bike. At the moment I practice pedaling at home when they’re trying to put me to bed.

As for me, well I am very pleased with my progress. I’ve been to several parties this year, eaten a whole heap of cake and even been to the theatre a few times! I’ve also learned how to put on my own shoes, trousers and coat. Vests and t-shirts are a bit trickier but I’m getting there. I’ve also learned how to do ‘the look.’ You know the one parents do when they disapprove? That. I’ve got it down. Now when Mummy or Daddy give me the look I give it right back to make them laugh. That doesn’t always work though.  I suppose it depends on what I’ve been up to. Turns out stealing Daddy’s headphones is not a laughing matter. Neither is drawing on the walls… Still, you live and learn.

So, I’ve done pretty well don’t you think? The biggest revelation for me in 2013 is that saying you’re sorry and/or that you love someone is a good way to get out of trouble. If that fails, make them laugh! I’m gonna work on more ways to do that. Alright 2014, bring it on – I’m ready for ya!


Santa’s a bit scary | From Mushroom’s mouth

Hello you lucky people. This is Mushroom. Someone told Mummy that when I write it’s way more engaging than when she does. Well of course it is. So She’s giving me a whole section of her blog to share my thoughts with you. See, you lucky, lucky people.

Christmas treeSo, seeing as it’s coming up to Christmas I thought I’d share my thoughts on the festive season with you. The short version is – I love it. I get more chocolate than usual and there are pretty shiny things and twinkly lights everywhere. Lovely. I really enjoyed putting up the Christmas tree (with a Twinkle Twinkle star on the top!) and I love turning on the lights every day as soon as it gets dark. Apparently on ‘Christmas day’ it will have lots of presents under it for me. I like the idea of getting lots of presents. It’s a bit confusing though, ’cause I’ve been getting some when I see my friends and Daddy keeps saying I have to wait until Christmas day to open them! Firstly, I thought it was Christmas now? And secondly, wait? Why wait? I’m not too good at that. I even say sorry ten seconds into a time out in the hope of getting out of doing a full minute (Mummy figured out quickly that a minute’s enough for me). Speaking of Mummy….

She’s a bit of a pushover when it comes to presents. I’ve opened three so far under her watch. Ha! One of them was when we went to a local park to see Santa. He’d just left, apparently, but his elves took pity on me and gave me a gift anyway. I like the elves. It was two enormous pencils. I broke them both by the evening. Mummy said not to worry as it was an ‘accident.’ I’m gonna start using that.

The most recent gift came when I actually met Santa. Like I said, he was a bit scary. First of all, I’ve been told he’s ‘Father Christmas,’ so I didn’t get who this ‘Santa’ guy was until Mummy explained it’s a bit like she’s Mummy but her friends call her Rachael. But I’m not Santa’s mate. Are you? Not even sure the elves are, I mean, they work for him don’t they? How matey can you be with your boss, really? Anyway. We went to Westfield (Stratford) to see him at his house. Before we saw him, we got to play in a big room with lots of pretend sweeties.  I stacked sweetie towers and told anyone who came near me that they were ‘mine!’ Mummy said it was rude. Whatever. I’d worked hard to stack those towers and wasn’t letting anyone knock them down! She tried to distract me by showing me a sleigh. I made all the right noises and then she wanted me to get on it. I don’t think so! What if it flew off to the North Pole? I made a big fuss, screaming ‘I not flying!’ and eventually she gave up.

Would you feel safe if this took off? No? Didn't think so.

Would you feel safe if this took off? No? Didn’t think so.

Then, we went through carpet covered doors, past some more sweeties (normal sized one this time) we weren’t allowed to eat (and the point of that is…? Anyone?), into a room with an enormous TV. We had to wear glasses, which I didn’t like so much but didn’t complain. Then we watched a film that started off being really scary! I shouted to Mummy that I wanted to go back and play but she ignored me. Then pictures of the children I’d seen in the other room appeared in the film, and eventually one of me! I liked that. The rest of the film was ok but there wasn’t enough of me in it if you ask me (no-one did).

Afterwards, we went to another room where I finally came face to face with the big man. He was enormous, and a bit scary. When it was my turn to talk to him I sat really close to Mummy. He asked me my age and some other stuff. I kept my mouth shut. Too many questions, old man! Eventually, he asked what I wanted for Christmas. I was giving it some thought but Mummy seemed a bit on edge, eyeing up the other parents. Did she not realise how important this was? She made a few suggestions and eventually she came up with the goods. She looked relieved when I told Father Christmas what I wanted. Can’t think why, it’s nothing to do with her! Anyway, I was ready to go after that and he gave me a present before I left. Result! I had to wait til Daddy got home to open it and I thought showed great restraint. Daddy wanted me to wait even longer but Mummy told him she’d already promised me (see? Pushover) so I was allowed. Besides, he got a gift too – a photo of me and Father Christmas! What more could he want?

So, parent bloggers…. How do you feel about Christmas? Do you prefer giving or receiving presents? And what about the kids? Do they like Father Christmas (Santa, if you’re matey with him – if you are, put in a good word for me would you)? Or do they find him a bit scary too?

Before I forget, if you do prefer giving you can add me to your list. I’ve been a good boy, honest.